But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
We were squawking at each other for over an hour like chickens. Literally. Never touching the stuff again and never again showing my face at that Denny's.
I was masturbating with the shower head and someone flushed the other toilet. Pretty sure I have 3rd degree burns on my clit.
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
random memory from the wedding, the bartender show us how to open the windows of the hotel and pee out of them
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
Are we sharing a room, or can I pack my vibrator?
Yes to both. We'll use the workout rotation from dorm life.
My inner buddhist recalls, "You receive the d when you aren't looking for it, only when the d wants you." True story.
Yes I did. Thanks. I was actually an hour and half early. I'm better at public transport than I thought. Guy behind me on the bus is also crying. We compared cry-snot. It was nice in a weird sad way.
You what they say. One dick in the hand is better than two in the bush
When he wakes up tomorrow with half shaved legs smelling like a preteens bathroom, I'm sure he will think he has had a great evening
Oh yeah, you are a real peach except for shitting uncontrollably and bleeding out of your face.
I'm glad you still love me even when I change pants in the kitchen and demand you spoon me
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
Randomize
