We better get laid next semester cause I prayed hard
I even walked 30 feet with my eyes closed from two love rocks so that we get some cock
i wish there was a holiday celebrated with pizza eating
It's 3 am and my parents just came up the driveway in a limo. They didn't leave in a limo. I'm scared to even ask.
people who like being in relationships make me feel bad about myself.
I just dropped macaroni right down my cleavage. For the sake of our future, I'm really banking on this being a turn on for you.
I feel like wearing underwear would just be poor planning
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
And literally 4loko margaritas are callin my name. They're like "Hey girl come on over here I'll make you forget about grades and boys and it'll be a good idea to send everyone 55 snapchats of your cleavage" ok
I'm trying to poop and took acid, this is going to end horrid or wonderful. Oh the amusement park, not the pooping.
Tequila is gods way of telling you don't fuck with tequila
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
Very unfortunate to find out the kid who took your virginity has never seen Star Wars🙃
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
Randomize
