He spelled "beautiful" wrong in his text
how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
I should be sponsored by Trojan
There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
I wish there was a "friends who have gained the most weight since high school" filter on facebook for when I am feeling fat.
why did u have a candy cane hung on your dick in the first place?
she has a santa fetish
cute.
it makes more sense than having a misplaced asshole
im not talking about this
Let me make this really simple. We woke up this morning and fucked three times. When I got up and took a shower she cleaned up the mess from last night and did the dishes. Then we went out and she bought me brunch. I don't give a FUCK how much you don't like her.
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
"I gave a guy a handjob last night, on a dog bed, inside a fireplace. It's going to be a good year."
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
Honestly I have a huge freedom boner right now and if I came it would be red white and blue
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
Fuck. I think I can already feel tomorrow's hangover. It's like future me cane back to warn present me about the impending doom but didn't turn the time dial back far enough.
Randomize
