your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
I've been at work for less than an hour and have pooped twice already. That's what happens when you start sleeping with your roommate and don't want to use the bathroom at home anymore.
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
I've come to realize that after waking up this morning for work no one wins in bar dice.
An accidental pregnancy to a guy with a trustfund is no mistake. It is a gift from god.
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
How can I explain how nice he is to you? ...like, I'm going to have to have my world famous why being a douche is sexy talk.
There is a chick wearing some guy's shirt wrapped around her waist as a skirt... She's flashing her panties to everyone as she sings karaoke. You need to get here.
Blizzard, Hour 9: I'm 7 beers deep and have finished Ninja Turtles. I am listening to the NYPD and Nassau Fire Dept pipes and drums and writing new drum scores in my head, which I may or may not remember tomorrow
I literally ate pizza on a toilet and made up reasons as to why you should make out with that boy. I am unstoppable.
No alcohol sales on Election Day. WTF? Today, of all days, I need to be splurged to to vote for any of these morons running for president.
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
Randomize
