id be glad to
24 hour fitness called offering me a free trial stating that you referred them to me. I told them you have been taking pics of naked guys in the locker room and selling them online.
That's not a bad idea, actually...
Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
At 4am he sent "uree asss ize anmazin"
I knew it would be a shit show so I just went ahead and took plan b before I even got there. How's that for responsible?
He actually offered up a silent prayer thanking God for my "tremendous ass." You tell me how my night is going.
Yeah except my drinking partners aka my parents went to sleep Cuz ya know, they're old.
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
Me my naked body. You bring the paints. I expect to be a panther by game time Sunday.
What do I get.
Panthers win you get to fuck the paint off me.
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
FUUUCK. sunburned vagina. this is the worst day ever. i'm not leaving my room until it peels.
Also I will be receiving my own bra in the mail because I left it at his place, woops
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
you asked if you could borrow my vagina for the night
The last time we went to a costume party, you walked around in a loincloth with a cross and said you were Jesus. I'm eager to see how much more offensive you can be.
Randomize
