I just wanna be some guy's midlife crisis
You're the end to all my bad dreams.
Did you have that reoccuring dream about me banging your mom again?
i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane..
Pooping in your heated bathroom to the sound of rain and instrumental guitar might be the greatest experience ever.
you went through ur friends list and posted an obscene comment on every ultrasound pic...."not his" "looks like a sea monkey"
I knew you were drunk when you poured scotch on a croissant and ate it.
if you ever come into my room screaming for me to set up rockband at 4:45 am ever again i will kill you
you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
He gave me the "I've pictured you while jerkin off" look
I was talking to some girls while you were falling off your bar stool into the person next to you.
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
I can't find a song to express how gay I'm feeling.
I just took like 30 condoms from the doctors office... no one can say I don't try to save my money.
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