sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
The cereal milk was almost black, the bacon was still frozen and the toast was soggy. And that was BEFORE I puked in her lap.
That was a $3000 rug we rolled him down the hill in.
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
Y'know, "Class cancelled because Professor is stuck in Mexico," is not something I expected in college. Let alone, "Professor is stuck in Mexico, AGAIN."
You just threw your burrito at the passing teenage couple and yelled "It's never gonna last" of course your were a shit show
Nothing says "I mean business" like using a cart at the liquor store.
Uh, he still talks to you after you basically sexually harassed him using emojis?
No I need this job. I actually contemplated buying a vibrator with my dad's credit card the other night.
i'm eating pizza lunchables and telling my boyfriend he can do better than me because i am a functional adult
Sometimes intelligent conversation doesn't mix well with a romantic interest. It's possible the two are best kept separate. Toys should just stay in the toy box.
Idk you're asking me for advice on dating bro, after I told you I got a convicts number today.
I did this clutch move yesterday at the bar where I grabbed a plastic cup for water and discreetly threw up in it while walking around and then tossed it. It was my best boot and rally ever
Turns out that Irishman put my panties under his pillow afterward. Thanks?
Just got a blow job from a woman on a ski slope. She said ski'ing frightens her and giving head calms her down. Glad I could help ma'am!
Randomize
