I told him that he is like a snow storm I never know when he is coming, how many inches I will get, or how long it will last
once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
Listen, i'm watching playoff hockey and eating waffles. i just don't have time for your drama today.
You took a fire extinguisher off the wall in the hallway to play Ghostbusters.
Bitches at mcdonalds acting like they never seen a girl puke in her own coat pocket before
They both just did a shot, head butted each other, did another shot and then slapped each other in the face. These could be the two guys we've been looking for all our lives
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
Is everyone touching their nose at me a sign that I should stop snorting vicodin off my phone in the bathroom at school?
I've gotten 2 singers numbers, a 6'5 dude has promised to take me to Oktoberfest, and I spent the night w a pilot named Zeus who looks like caramel tastes. Also I sprained my thumb punching some guy I named 'hater'. I love Nashville
I'm done being drunk I wish I could snap my fingers and be sober
And he's back on taking these stupid testosterone supplements to kickstart him back into working out. And they just make him angry and horny all the time. I'm like great, just in time to meet my whole family for Christmas.
I can't believe I got dumped for a fat chick, but at least I got four and a half years worth of free shit. So we can call it even.
I mean metaphorically. Literally zombies have yet to invade. Let's be rational here.
I thought this boy told me to choke him, so I went all in. Turns out he really said “stroke.”
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