Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
i just saw a girl w/ a shirt that said "im the single friend." yeah i bet u r. stop wearing shirts like that and that could change.
I met his dad. Turns out he was a one nighter from the nurses conference in Vegas. Not sure how to handle this one.
Clearly, you already have. Both of them.
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
This is exactly why you shouldn't bang your bartender. Although the awkward free shots are a plus.
I don't want to be Eskimo brothers with your dad
I'm sobbing to NWA
YOU BETTER TOUCH MY NIPPLES TODAY
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
My vagina doesn't have a refer a friend program. You don't get $25 for getting your friend to have sex with me.
You WHAT?!?!
Paid. A. Homeless. Guy. To. Throw. A. Drink. In. Her. Face.
I fucking love you.
He's literally cuddling with the washer and dryer.
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
She threw her burger out the car window last night. My vegan neighbors were not pleased but I’m pretty sure I saw a for sale sign go up on their lawn so I owe her one.
I ate at the cafeteria for the first time yesterday and today I think I had an hour long fart.
Randomize
