ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
I told him the truth. Truth leads to vodka. Vodka leads to tequila. Tequila leads to prison.
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
You call it a hangover, I call it a baby squirrel burrowing its way out of my head.
I don't hate him I just hate being present to see him consume 80 dollars worth of alcohol and then try to tip people with left over money on a Walmart gift card
Hope you had your fill for the summer my friend, because all the cleavage has been put away for the winter. Fear not; it blooms again in May.
You're lucky you got out when you did, about an hour later the girl in the Franzia box started wrestling everyone.
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
i was sitting on the kitchen floor shaking my gallon of vodka at people and asking if they wanted to climb the heaven hill... getting dumped is the best thing that has ever happend to me
If you had a good reason for throwing the toaster at the wall, now's a good time to tell someone. My parents are on their way back and you know my dad and his pop tarts.
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
Randomize