Most awkward thing ever just happened. I was reaching in my purse to get something and a condom fell out into the woman's lap next to me. At least she knows I'm safe.
I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
Most violent shit of my life. New Years resolution of eating better is already kicking me in the face.
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
I need to make a new year's resolution to only pee in toilets. And it needs to start happening before the new year.
Yeah everyone's alive and well besides the still terrifying threat of Ted's conception of a human being
Watching him and my sister argue over a rum and coke about who's going to chop the coffee table in half with a hatchet...
did you know the cops in wilco have clean up kits in their cars for when people puke in them? i found this out this morning. i'm finishing paperwork now. come get me plz?
my talents include tricking people into giving me money and free drugs
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
Just found out that my name comes from part of my mom's old stripper name.
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
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