Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
Rosebud was a fucking sled. Gay.
You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
I keep telling girls I work at the carnival and then guessing their weights. I'm pretty sure I'm about to get kicked out.
Fuck you, jack daniels. I feel like satan laid an egg in my brain.
how does someone with a Masters Degree leave poop in an ashtray in the sink? It just blows my mind
Did you take the bag w/your drugs & cookie cutter?
Maybe why that's why I'm perpetually single... I can't find a guy with bigger balls than mine.
If it exists, I've probably pregamed it.
You know tonight's gonna be a good night when your already planning on sleeping in a trunk
Listen, you eat the donut. I eat you out. Everybody wins.
I begin to question your sobriety when you both left here shirtless, with beers in one hand and shotguns in the other
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