Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
so exactly how many freshman chicks did i tell to call me "the tripod"?
She started doing push ups and calling me a pussy. Never set me up with your ROTC friends again.
Right now I can't do anything that will ban me from donating plasma. That is a legit source of income for me.
Fuck. I'm going to pass the savings right on to the strippers. It's trickle down economics.
i think they forgot i was still in the room... she grabbed his balls and said "i feel a fire coming on".
So the name of the kid from the sponsor a child comercial popped into my head while I was masturbating this morning. Needless to say I will now be now be donating out of guilt.
We realized tonight that we have to get advice about guys from you because you're our only straight male friend that neither of us has slept with.
I've already made the "blackout on move in day" decision
If blow jobs were a super power she'd be in the Justice League.
Just saw a rice crispy commercial and got emotional. I need to go home.
He wore the same cologne as my orthodontist so all I could think about was how I hadn't worn my retainer in months
This is not a drill. I need a cape. And a tuxedo. Simultaneously. Repeat. NOT. A. DRILL....
Fuck it. I'm going for it. You're only young once, right?
You've been saying that for 5 years now. Let me know when the novelty wears off.
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
Randomize
