He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
if you find a joe biden blowup doll in the attic, I call dibs
From the crime scene it appears that I attempted to throw up into a candle.
I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
that's why you don't digest questionable powders from girls wearing tutus at a dirty club
I love you. Thanks for all the blowjobs.
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
did you know the cops in wilco have clean up kits in their cars for when people puke in them? i found this out this morning. i'm finishing paperwork now. come get me plz?
I can't believe I came last night staring into my profile pictures eyes.
I'm not gay but if a lesbian wants to eat my box out I'm not gonna say no to someone who knows what they're doing.
One door closes, one man cooks for you through the next open door
90% sure I just sold adderall to my professor
100% proud
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