I love you!
You're insane
Fuckin crazy man! Seriously though I think if you would have me I honestly seriously think about marrying u!
Alright now lets video chat so I can xshow u my dick! Hahahaha
what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
when "blow-job jen" drunk dials you at 3 in the morning, you answer
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
mid blow job she looked up and said "we aren't even facebook friends!"
I accidently showed a girl my balls already today. Made me think of you.
She started howling at the moon. That was pretty much the deal breaker.
First booty call in Europe.. In Barcelona. With a German. In broad daylight.... Is that how they do it here?
bring the dog... nobody goes to jail with a dog.
Nothing like hearing "I found your pinky nail" before you even noticed it was missing.
I recommend we watch the Super Bowl together and have celebratory sex if we win. Good news is I don't have a team I dislike so were guaranteed a win.
Would it be inappropriate to do a science fair project on whether the type of drunk a person is is determined by nature or nurture
dude you're not even a fucking science major
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
I want to fling myself into the sun
Randomize
