Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
i may or may not be hanging out with a boxer who has a daughter tonight. and he just spelled "honestly" like "onistly". He has prob taken a few too many hits to the head but he's hot at least.
she was stuffing dove chocolates in my mouth while giving me a blow job. GOD I LOVE VALENTINES DAY
my parents are out trying to convince the local liquor stores to post "do not sell our daughter alcohol" flyers. i'm preping my defense now.
you made sure you came back for your bottle of vodka but didn't remember to take your shoes
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
Well he was saying something about being emotionally unavailable since his dad died, but then I blew him in a tree and he shut up
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
I found a hot kiwi last time and sucked his dick. That's what rooftop bars are made for.
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
It’s 830 am and the amount of Valentine’s Day snaps I’ve already seen makes me either want to vom, drink a bottle of wine, or buy chocolate
1000% No lie I was just looking on insta and was thinking about taking a bottle of wine to the face..
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
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