check it out our google latitudes are spooning
New all-time record for most uncomfortable I've ever been. A midget just asked me to restrap his fanny pack in the bathroom.
I just made out with a girl with a life jacket on wtf is going on
please hurry. your mom just evil laughed to herself in the kitchen like she's plotting my death.
The only word I understood in that whole setence was semen.
I was the last girl at the bar last night. It was like a battle royale between 10 guys.
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
Put you drinking hat aside for Tuesday. My buddy is bartending!
I just puked in my drinking hat.
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
I'm driving up the street and can't tell if my ears are actually about to pop or not.
A solid 8.5 on the baked meter, I need to stop.
I'm seeing how long I can hold this wine in my mouth. I have so many adventures! I'm like Teddy Ruxpin!
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
Being able to fart in her presence and not be judged is why I pay half the rent.
But I am still fully ok with my life choices as long as the consequences aren't onesies and pacifiers
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
Randomize
