There's a woman here that looks like a cross between Michael Jackson and Flipper.
Dude. Fucked her last night. Fucked her this morning. went downstairs for water. took 18 pack of Coors Light instead and took it back to my gf's. Got a blow job from her. Drinking the beer on my deck now. Best Day ever.
When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
I got an 8 ball and a free entrance pass to the strip club, if i dont get laid tonight I never will.
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
I just dropped my cookie in my glass of milk and looked at it for ten minutes. Thanks for telling me you made weed cookies.
Everything's a blur with pockets full of jello
It's not even like I care. He was cute 30lbs ago and before he fucked that Michael Jackson look alike.
how do you play pong handcuffed?
The secret to finals week is to have an orgasm for every point you need on the test before you take it.
Unless he's under 18, in which case you put him back where you found him this instant.
I was planning out a scrapbook to memorialize my affair.......and that's when it hit me, I don't make good choices. On the upside, the scrap book came out great and I am glad I saved all the gate passes from the airport.
You are the epitome of what awesome would taste like.
It is getting ridiculous, the elaborateness of the schemes I have to concoct so my suitemates don't know I'm pooping.
it's 1043 pm. still havent changed out of the shirt i wore last night so at this point i figure i'll go for twosies.
Randomize
