IF CHARLIE SCHEEN CAN DO IT I CAN DO IT IM A PROFESSONAL
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
i told him i should keep a toothbrush at his house for after all the times i threw up there. he said yes but i wasnt getting a key to the apt
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
I just yelled at my mom for getting me circumcised without my permission. That drunk
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
I literally got so drunk last night, I texted myself "porpoises" and that was it. I have no recollection of this.
He got me a cake that said " Congratulations on the dick "
P.s. I loved that your balls smelled like coconut
I think I'm still high. And I definitely still smell like lobster, so there's that
Idk I've taught my 18 month old how to say nipple so kids aren't all bad
How did you interpret 'wheat thins' from 'vaginal trauma'?
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
Did you see her happy birthday to emily on facebook? The gist of it is like: hey emily you almost died at birth im glad you didn't. love mom.
Last time i cooked this high i tried to makw bacon amd then burned myselfbon the grill, only to realize 25min latwr when the bacon wouldnt cook that the grill wasn't on. I IMAGINED the burn.
Randomize
