You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
I think the sex offender registry is kind of a VIP list. You get to not live near noisy schools and parks and all your neighbors get to know you.
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid.
dude, she was giving me a lapdance and her thong had a skid mark. no I did not hit it.
All I remember from my 21st is crying because the bouncer made him put his shirt back on
No subtext here. People are naked.
She just kept screaming you name over and over. Im starting to think this is my alarm clock
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
It's the only time I've ever felt manly shitting myself
"I'm gonna wax that ass" was the successful pick up line used on me last night. Clearly I had a few too many cause it worked..
For Halloween this year I'm going to paint myself in gold, wear a golden toga and sash saying " cunt goddess"
Dude, you got arrested for trying to direct traffic with your dick....
Literally I woke up the other day and the girl part of me was like “GET CUFFED MOTHERFUCKER” and I went ham on tinder.
You don't make any sense
TEQUILA
Randomize
