Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
She just sent me a picture of a heart. I need to stop fucking freshman...
why weren't you at the audition last night?
booty call before role call
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
And why did 3 people fail to stop me from literally getting a piggy back ride from the bar to his apartment?!
Why did 20 jello shots in a row sound like a good idea last night?
I've only left my bed to pee and eat nutella out of the jar with my fingers
STOP TELLING PEOPLE I PEED ON YOU
I can't believe you big bird do not remember battling a shark last night it turned into a Pokemon battle and big bird over powered the shark
I like how my motivation to lose weight is so I can wear a nude bikini and get covered in body paint for the tribal party. Priorities.
I threw up in the darkest corner of the bar last night, then watched 2 girls freak out in disgust after walking through it. I then realised I puked on the dancefloor, took a picture and proceeded to send it to my mom.
Kind of like the new iOS 10 because I can send sexts with fireworks or confetti. Really gets the point across
Just had to break it to that one guy that I can't sleep w him bc he looks identical to my brother. So how's your morning?
"Fwd: Nice to meet you last night thanks for the tit flash" no recollec. i am officially banned from wearing tube tops to the bar.
Randomize
