so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
Smoked a bowl on a rollercoaster. Literally ON. Beat that.
Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.
We were driving to the party as he was giving me key bumps.. That's what I call team work
i just wasnt prepared to have the baby of one of two french firemen. threesomes are too confusing.
Weekend has begun hello red wine at 10am on a Wednesday
he just used "boss" and "boner" in the same sentence. I cant respond.
no you went to jail because you don't know how to whisper when offering a cop a blow job. I'm sure him having a chick partner didn't help.
I didn't just randomly come up with it. But if you want to give me extra credit for creativity I have a bare chest and chocolate sauce left
I'm basically a mama hen. I keep them warm and let them wonder around the house. not to mention, I keep eye on them just in case the falcons around the house try to snatch them away.
I don't even know what to say right now
What drink are we having for lunch?
Some people say 6pm is too early to get drunk. To them I say this dinner is delicious.
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
I’m never getting home or fucked or eating hot Taco Bell fml
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