Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
I put the extra pregnancy test in my sex toys box as a reminder that my actions have consequences.
oh dont worry, my liver will give out way before i get skin cancer
blah blah blah they called me an alcoholic because I threw my beer at a Jesus freak. it was for the best
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
I have learned that if you don't want to hook up with the guy who walked you home, food is great compensation.
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
Whats proper etiquette for apologizing to your wife for being so drunk you stood up and pissed on the bedroom floor next to the bed?
Don't remember our skype call last night too well, but did I pee while skyping you?
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
I am high playing guitar hero naked. Please don't let me die this way
You're now part of the minority of friends who haven't seen my boobs.
Apparently I told him the people made me order taco bell I didn't even want it. And then proceeded to turn off all the lights and sit at the kitchen table in the dark and told him not to look at me.
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