no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
Dudes got a Polo tattoo. I don't care if he has a yacht I can't handle that level of gay.
just woke up to find an unpeeled banana, with a condom on, halfway into my vagina. this better not be you trying to be funny
I still don't understand how I went from crying to blowing you in like two minutes.
I was carrying him baywatch style into my place because he passed out.
I'll start choreographing the sperm rain dance now
You told her to step on the scale because you had whiskey goggles, and scales don't lie.
S.O.S. he's talking about horses and breast feeding.
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
It's a strange mix of shame and pride every time I pee at the bar and still see my lipstick on the bathroom wall...
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game
Aloha alcoholism.
Also this guy in my contact as hairy jerry sent me a pic of him shirtless and said I miss you and I have no idea who he is /when or if I met him but that's not normal?!
Made it to my hair appointment on time, and got some dick. Today is already a great day
I feel so accomplished. I've cleaned my room, done laundry, called those places, gotten jobs, and masturbated.
I'm so proud of you.
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