That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
So then I told him that only a restaurant managed by a florida fan could run out of ketchup
disregard all texts ive sent you minus taco motherfucking bell
Omg. One night stands are not supposed to show up to your swim class the morning after. Worst lesson ever.
Apparently he took me home and I pulled up my senior pictures on fbook and made him guess what I was thinking during each different pose.
She's in the bathroom. Literally just told me she could make a guy cum using just her words. Not bad for Sunday brunch.
She keeps feeding me drugs. Its like I'm her baby bird or something
This snow needs to melt so I can get wasted on someones front lawn
My brother really should've known better than to make me go egg hunting with his daughter when I was entirely too drunk to do so. Threw up in a plant in front of her.
Did I try to sell your body for chicken tenders last night?
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
He gave me an orgasim so fantastic that I had an asthma attack.
Kid walks in and orders 24 Mcdoubles and 14 large fries, as he's handing me the money he tells me he lost at rock paper scissors so he had to do the munchie run.
Randomize
