Ur dog is a babe magnet. Reminds me of me
So I'm going back to my apartment just to get my vibrator.
I thought you were moving in with your boyfriend for the summer?
Well....one will keep me from having to pay rent and the other satisfies. I'll let you figure it out.
Here's my recipe for happiness. Go get a pen. 1. smoke a bowl 2. put on explosions in the sky 3. take a bath. Do this for about 1 hour or until all your problems go away.
I found him crying and drunk, in my closet holding a picture of Tyler Perry. He managed to say"he's just so many people"
how do i say "thank you for the blowjob, but never talk to me again" without crushing her?
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
i woke up in his neighbors pool house. Not sure how I got here but there is people swimming outside. how do I escape?
just fucking run.
It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
There are Vine videos that have lasted longer than he did
Just used my flashlight app to find a gummy lifesaver I dropped on the floor
I like how you're utilizing your resources
man my uterus needs to drop the egg or GTFO, BUUUSHIT
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
I legit feel like I had sex with Joey Fatone. Is that weird?
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
Randomize
