This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
My BOSS just pulled out a box of Christmas stuff labeled reefs.
I'm on a cruise to the Bahamas and this text message is gunna cost me $10 but I need you to pray on my behalf for the things I'm about to do these 2 girls and what I did last night to a 35 year old mother of 3.
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
I am solely responsible for the birth of their child. I mean, I did push them into the room and hold the door shut yelling "punch that kitty!". It has to be a sign.
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
Okay I know I said I was going to quit drinking for a while but apparently pumpkin pie flavored vodka is a thing and I will not rest until I have some.
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
The last thing I remember was riding in a grocery cart with two strangers while a cop pushed us
I want to get a list going called "D list celebs I've kissed"
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
I feel like a bottle of fireball rented a bull dozer and ran me over until I was left without a shred of my dignity
Van sex tonight? No need to tell me how classy that sounded.
I went to the hospital to have my arm checked out, and they already knew the story. They gave me props for posting photos on facebook before even coming to the hospital.
i think i just naturally attract stoners
Randomize
