The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
He lit his shirt on fire at the bar by putting a lit cigarette in the pocket to "save for later."
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
i just sold back the books i vomitted on
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
I think the imperative here is that I literally knocked down a sorority house with the force of my dick.
He bought me a pink rose and a Plan B. I really like this guy.
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
Omg. I have a story to tell you later about that girl that just crawled on stage
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
i'm eating pizza lunchables and telling my boyfriend he can do better than me because i am a functional adult
I JUST BROKE A NAIL MASTURBATING. WTF I could even enjoy my orgasm bc now I'm gonna have to spend $50 on my nails.
I've realized that drinking at your apartment alone on a Tuesday probably isn't a good thing.
Randomize