You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
I feel like death. And death is wearing a fleece blanket as a dress. And is seriously contemplating wearing this to go get something to eat.
sick fucks of a feather flock together
The ultimate Father's Day bonding experience: Both getting bailed out of jail by mom for mooning some shithead cop.
How did "just two beers for happy hour" turn into naked backyard wrestling?
Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now
He's the only guy without a tacky accent I've seen in this southern dump in 6 months. Bangage was inevitable.
You're such a Yankee.
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
New low: eating a buttered roll while taking a shit.
This is why we're soulmates.
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
I really need to get a comfy set of masturbating shoes
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
What?? I could've slept with an ordained minister!
Did you make it home alright?
No I'm sitting under a tree by a cricket. He's alone crying out for someone to Fuck him. This guy gets me.
I don't want to hook up with him sober. That's pretty much like saying I love you.
Randomize
