glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
i just hugged the lady at the liquor store goodbye for the summer...
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
coming out of a blackout being surrounded by Disney police was not as awesome as it sounds.
Then he said something about how from that angle I looked just like his mom.
I just came so hard there were tears. Actual tears.
No, man, we stole the housekeeper's key and we're just going room to room raiding mini fridges. Hurry
Logan has the vodka and snickers. We're making a run for it. Room 302
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
There should be a rule.......that if you have a small penis you must wear a hat with propellers on it so you can fly the hell off the planet.
Taco trucks are like ice cream trucks for drunk adults. They should have a mariachi tune they play super loud to bring people out of the bars for tacos.
I just threw up 34 cents. What in god's name did we do last night?
His middle name is Julius so I named his penis Caesar and told him he has to say "Hail Caesar!" whenever he comes. He didn't seem to like the idea, though.
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