I am now Facebook friends with Donkey Lips from Salute Your Shorts
At one point we asked the guy to play "the lion sleeps tonight" with his bagpipes. Best version ever.
i prefer some hard alcohol, but wine makes me feel less of a progressive alcoholic
how many lesbians have to have their hearts broken before they realise I am not that kind of DJ
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
I'm not having the "why are your fucking my daughter" talk and the "your a drug addict" talk with your mom tonight.
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
He played with my boobs the whole time we watched Scott Pilgrim and then started invited others to play with them too. It reminded me of how my mom gives out my french fries without asking.
You attract beautiful men with jobs. I attract ONE WITH A SOUL PATCH.
it was a sexy soul patch.
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
I don't think it's ever a good night if I'm this hung over and I didn't even get an orgasm out of the deal...
Just zoned back in to real life and found myself chanting "noodle eater noodle eater noodle eater" at my parrot as he devoured a single macaroni
Noted. Next time you want to get fried chicken and cocaine.
Ok. That just sounds baller.
Like how do you live your life and have never made a grilled cheese? The audacity of some people
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