Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
there should be laws that require people like to me to be on birth control.
Just got a call at work, I have to consent to a random drug and alcohol test by end of business day, if you arranged this it's the best/worst April fools prank ever.
My male hookup buddy is gonna meet my female hookup buddy, let the awkward hookup games begin!
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
i think if i got caught drinking at work i could get away with it if i started crying and saying my cat just died. as long as i'm confident.
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
We passed out in his car so I had to find a way to inconspiciously make my walk of shame back inside to go get my shit. To make things more difficult I had no pants and the whole neighborhood was awake
I guess, all I remember was giving you road head the whole way there so you wouldn't fall asleep.
I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
My cat is staring at me while I drink my wine on the bathroom floor in the morning instead of attending class. Sorry mom and dad. Sorry cat.
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
Randomize
