Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
I just watered my plants with apple juice. Look what you made me do.
And then she said "sorry if my vagina smells like fish, it's just active."
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
Listen, you can whine about not having a "red" wine glass, or you can suck it up and chug it from the vase like the rest of us. The choice is yours.
I can't wait for the day Google doesn't remind me that I got arrested for having 3 shots called 'frog cum' lined up in front of me.
I hope you dream of an avalanche of penises
If you're wearing dry underwear your day is already better than mine.
Well, I got fired yesterday. At least I already paid for my Adele tickets.
it'll be like the notebook except for with way more of my penis
During my first week as an adjunct prof, I played a fiercely fought game of squash with a law student and we wound up having hot, sweaty, angry sex right on the floor of the court. She is either the best or worst thing to happen to my academic career. Will let you know.
Any who, I expect to be showered with roses apon my arrival
How about beer and nachos?
A fine substitute!
My vagina! What have you done to it?
Blessed it my child.
My Mini-Van Handjob Milf is leaving the company. I need to find a new job. I can’t handle this place without those handjobs
Randomize
