He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
I'm pretty sure I just had a convo with my hot pockets about how they weren't good enough for the oven.
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
Ha, I bet. You tipped the waitress like 10 bucks for a glass of water.
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
I HOPE YOURE READY TO KICK SOME SERIOUS ASS AT TRIVIA NIGHT TOMORROW NIGHT. also, i hope the birth of your niece goes well. BUT MOSTLY TRIVIA NIGHT.
We ended not having sex. I didn't want to explain that I was wearing a Unitard because all my socks and underwear were dirty.
He just remixed a spongebob song with 2 chainz..... Clearly I love him
i knew as soon as i met you that i was gonna be the designated driver
I'm pretty sure the Jahovah's witness only came to our door because the front says "Twerk Or Treat"
I'm so baked, I spent the last hour trying to screencapture the cracks on my phone.
His roommates are gone so we had sex in every room of the house and watched the wire. What have you done today?
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
THERE IS A DOG IN THE CLUB. I repeat a dog in the club. I might have laid down and petted it..I have no shame.
Randomize
