just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
shotgunning a bud heavy is like shotgunning a turkey sandwich
I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
there's a wrestler here in a Ferrari//puma hoodie who is telling girls his win//loss record as a pickup line.
my drunk uncle just explained that turkeys are not gentle lovers... and no context doesn't make it better.
Haha I wonder if my burp offended him. So I gave him a fist pump to signify how friendly I am
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
I found him in bed on a pullout couch with another dude. He had two empty puke buckets and his empty bottle of jagermeister right by his head.
i'm not saying you're gay. i'm just saying all my gay friends think you have a great ass.
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
I just gotta say that I feel so much better now that I got some. I mean I feel like a normal functioning adult ready to contribute to society.
Next time you decide to go downstairs hungover, please warn me. I now have to explain to twenty eight year olds why you were naked.
I just dropped a condom on the floor at costco in front of my girlfriend and her husband. Today is not going to go well.
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
Randomize
