I feel like abortions should bother me more
why is every porn film shot in the same house? with the same red couch!?!
So I was talking to her on the phone last night and had to mute it so I could take a crap.
Side Note: My mute button doesn't work.
Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
this ugly chick literally cried last night because i wouldnt let her give me head
Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
For months it was all good and well just having sex. Now, something in me has snapped and I'm dreaming of taking turtleneck Christmas pictures with him. Fuck you, we're going out tonight. I need this.
I saw a crackhead in a ballerina outfit riding a bike while waving her hands and one leg in the air. Never seen such talent in my life
Please, by all means, tell me what can't be helped by two stiff drinks & a blowjob?
And tan into my neighbor in the elevator. She was going to the gym. I was covered in mascara and dog hair eating a hash brown
He won't have sex to beyonce. I hate him.
How can you tell that you're blacked out ?
You can feel it in your nipples.
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
Randomize
