sounds like you fell off the wagon.
fuck falling off. at this point, the wagon is a dot on the horizon.
I'm like a warm blanket that has sex with you
The only dream I remember having is one where my dad's sperm turned into baby hippos. Like, tiny baby hippos, pocket-sized. I am so fucked up.
Someone in my history class just FB messaged me saying they highly suggest I put my sunglasses on. He is sitting 18 rows in front of me...
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
totally just got a week extension on my midterm by telling my prof that I had just found out I was adopted
We've reached the point in our fuck buddy relationship where we are playing words with friends. This is too intimate.
apparently I crawled into someone's bed and demanded they call me 'big dog' before shotgunning a beer
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
I'd rather take 10 virginities than catch something. Right now I should be good, I mean the sex with Jake was so bad he can't possibly have an std
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
Evidently I placed three booty calls at the same time...it was an ugly scene. I'm never getting that high again.
She started calling me daddy on the second date and I don't know how to react to that
i had sex with a girl named after a fruit last night and it was the best thing to happen to me in 2020
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