If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
I need to buy a mesh tank top to fit in in Florida. Where do they even sell that shit?
i'm pretty sure god just pointed at me and laughed
She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
I'm way too drunk on a Sunday to handle this level of Jesus.
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
Woke up this morning on my doorstep in a basket with a branch, a lipstick lightning bolt on my head and a sign that said "the boy who lived." i love you guys.
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
If I ever go to Canada, I'm fucking the maple syrup out of his Canadian ass.
He stopped his car in the middle of ongoing traffic to ask me to marry him. Then he got pulled over. Yeah I'd say the slutty Dallas Cowboys costume was a success.
Your hotness may or may not have landed him in jail.
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
Randomize
