he said he didn't have a condom.
and you said?
that that's fine cause i was ready to be a mom. yeah - he magically had a condom he forgot about after that.
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
I think I left a blow job at your house. Can I come down and get it?
I gave it to your brother to give to you.
I'm gonna cougar town the shit out of that prom.
I just kept screaming "I'm fucking a preacher's son!" Also, this water tastes like weed.
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
I just told the toilet I loved it. Bad sign.
I never thought I'd say this, but I think I just saw the hottest pregnant chick alive.
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
He's scared I want a relationship? How does texting him at three am and sleeping with four of my exes symbolize that?
She said my mask was creepy, took it off with her teeth, and proceeded to bite my neck. I love vampires.
Ben Franklin would totally be a furry.
You're smoking weed and checking Tumblr I take it?
I had more orgasms than hours of sleep this weekend. I’m going to keep him around a while
She dry humped my leg in the raw while I was still dressed, came, and then fell asleep on top of me. All I got was a bruised thigh. 2020 needs to end.
Randomize
