What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
Turns out drinking large amounts of Gentleman Jack does NOT turn you into a Gentleman -- quite the opposite actually.
there are singles shoved down my panties. this is the type of summer job i always wanted.
i just got fired from my job because i was "too smart" and my immedate response was i am WAY too stoned to be considered smart, and theni walked out the door.
wow. i have no words.
it was either that or behind a dumpster, and i am way too pretty to pee behind a dumpster
we're on our way back. she tried to pants the waiter again.
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
We found him flat on his back, sobbing, 'fuck you stars' at the sky. No more everclear for Derek.
Do you remember biting my ear and whispering quotes of Pride and Prejudice last night?
I'm on the couch watching HGTV googling giant boob Halloween costumes so life is swell
In honor of the new administration, I'm going to make it my goal this weekend to get some lesbian action. Fuck Donald Trump and fuck Mike Pence. I'm going to be a spiteful gay.
All I remember is pissing by the garage and the next thing I know I'm on fire
For someone who claims to be straight, she knows a hell of a lot about bi erasure, and one Hayley Kiyoko song too many
I'm fairly sure I accidentally saw my dad naked last night
Hi darlin, what are you doing tonight?
.... Things I will not be proud of
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