btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
My New Years Resolution was to get a girl I dont know pregnant. 8 months later I can check that off the list..
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
He cummed in my mouth, then said he had to go because his best friend broke his foot falling off of a balcony, put twenty dollars in my hand and was gone before I could even swallow...
i don't know where i am. i made bad decisions. i think this guy is dead.
and I'm sitting five inches from the tv scrunched up in a ball watching doug. It's like I'm five again...except I'm more stoned than the dude who created this show
P.S. I just watched The Muppets. I feel like I just got a sadness enema.
time for you to cut the loving, understanding, non-judgmental crap and say/do whatever it takes to make sure I never, ever, ever sleep with him again ever
She asked if I could convince him so shave that shit off his face so he'll have a snowball's chance in hell of getting laid.
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
I NEED A MOM FRIEND. NOW.
I just caught my bangs on fire trying to lite a bowl while driving. Thank god it wasn't my eyebrows like last time.
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
I'm like a camel in the desert in a black hole I'm so thirsty.
Randomize
