Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
Coming down off exstacy at a church event. Resisting the urge to dance to the church hymns.
literally followed a trail of condoms to the bus stop this morning. Ahh modern-day bread crumbs
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
Divorce is final. Doing tequila shots at 1 in the afternoon.
We were showing our tits to everyone because it's breast cancer awareness month and we care deeply
I thought we were doing it cause it's Tuesday
I just remembered that he had fake blood all over his face last night. I woke up with it all over my dick. He was 50. Please don't judge me.
they were having sex on the toilet apparently and everytime someone knocked they flushed. it was like an auditory scoreboard of sex duration.
...i'd have to set their sheets on fire.
i'll booty call him tonight after the radiohead concert, that way he can see his favorite band and his favorite vagina all in one night.
i had a super strange, mommy/daddy issuestastic, mildly freudian, i-might-as-well-become-a-stripper-now-and-stop-fighting-the-inevitable dream last night :(
I'm usually good at keeping a straight face, but not while singing a ballad to a stranger in a bathroom.
I woke up to Elf. I don't know which one of you put that in my DVD player when I passed out but I appreciate you.
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