I went from sexy to sloppy in a matter of minutes
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
you kept yelling at her to "show me your genitals" until the bouncers told us to leave...at which point you showed them YOUR genitals...
please don't ever take me to a strip club again...
why didn't you say something constructive like "stop chugging that vodka"?
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
I'm making celebratory pizza rolls. They're a lot like regular pizza rolls, but without the taste of shame.
I just celebrated my ex boyfriends birthday by having more sex than he will today.
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
I wish we couldve been like jesus and the desiples tongith
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
I can't get the smell of burned penis out of the house
so i fell out of a tree on the ave last night. someone told me there was alcohol at the top. bastards.
Already drunk, almost got in a fight with a bunch of irish chicks. And another with canadians. On my way to get a tattoo. I plan to regret this trip.
Randomize
