Last night, you attempted to motor boat my vagina then proceeded to blow raspberries on it. Don't ever do that again.
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
I just figured out that you can toast a marshmallow with a butter knife and a cigarette lighter. I'm like a retarded Mister Wizard
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
Just smoked out of an apple with Steve Jobs. I love Halloween.
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
You showed them your nipple for dollars for the jukebox. You were depressed because only one of your songs played. Oh then you twisted your ankle and blamed it on your mad stripper skills.
No shame in my game.
It gives me purpose in life to help fulfill nerdy fantasies. Like I'm doing something good for mankind and having multiple orgasms in the process.
Naw man, if he's crazy enough to jerk off on a public bus he's too crazy for me to fuck with
I just spilled a shot of Patron on your mom.. Body shots may be happening. You better get here quick.
Unless he's under 18, in which case you put him back where you found him this instant.
I found a bar with Metallica and a fire eater. I'm home
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