...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
I'm having sex on a snuggie, yes i stopped to text you
im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
He will not just "come" out of the closet. He will fall out, 69ing me, with two fingers in his starving asshole, wearing cum splattered lady gaga sunglasses, weeping.
That was the greatest thing i have ever read.
So another one of your girlfriends from middle school had a baby. Thank god you are gay, otherwise you would definitely be a dad by now.
Dropping acid was like seeing the whole world as a blank canvas to imagine anything I wanted.
And apparently all you wanted was to watch the sun explode and me take 60,000 dicks to the face.
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
A dry HJ only, please. I don't deserve the comforts of lube after my horrendous fantasy football performance
Woohoo! Instead of a pregnancy test you can buy me a burrito
I told my fuck buddy that I wanted one of his arms to take home with me to hold onto in bed and he was hurt that I didn't want to bring him, like as a person, home to my family. I feel like you and only you could appreciate this.
She started throwing ice at me and started yelling, "Holy water bitches! This is an exorcism!"
It's a herpes check up not a beauty pageant
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
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