Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
they just came back. i guess "were gonna go get dinner" means "were gonna fuck for 5 minutes at the little league field"
I would go down on you faster than GM stock
she looked like the before picture.
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
I'm really proud of myself for not blacking out yet this weekend!
It's a Thursday.
If you happen to tell anybody my drunk story in the near future, please refrain from telling them about me shitting myself. People are getting the wrong idea and random people are messaging me on Facebook making fun of me for that
Also, I might need your help for a prank involving a hand puppet, a coke bottle, double-sided tape, and my dick...
I said to him "i can't have sex with anyone in my friend's living room" then he said "we can move the air mattress into the kitchen"
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
Ugh a 13 year old just asked me why people drink, I had to explain it without making it sound good. I need a drink.
Yo. What's your name again? You put "don't tell your landlord" as your name lol
Ahhh, beer. My second favorite breakfast drink.
Randomize
