I decided to name my penis gatorade...is it in you?
Spotted: jayne dropping her cigarettes in a puddle...then picking them back up and putting them in her pocket. If i ever get that desperate, stop talking to me
It's just like soggy cereal, but cancerous
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
Whats the opposite of morning wood? Whatever its called, everyone saw it when it fell out.
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
I miss my brother. He would have fucked the fat girl for me.
I told you I would
I wouldnt do that to you. You're my actual friend
Give me a second. I'm doing my best but I'm drunk so for some reason fitting both my boobs in the pic is just incredibly difficult. They aren't THAT big. I'm just being retarded.
Seriously I am not buying you condoms anymore. You're 22, if you aren't woman enough to buy them yourself then you don't deserve orgasms. Grow some tits.
and then you called me a third time and yelled that you were stealing a puppy named Willow
Mashed potatoes are always the fuckin answer ok.
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
He just texted me a video of him jerking off. He must really be looking forward to the Super Bowl.
No feeling is better than coming home from your booty call and putting on a fresh pair of granny panties
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
Randomize
