Memory from last night that just came back: me forcibly jacking him off while he yelled I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
I woke up on a raft in a bath tub filled with beer. excellent night.
Was this before, or after you took my brand new bag of shredded cheese, and "Made it rain"?
i should teach a seminar on how to fall off the wagon
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
dude you said you were going to be a human flag and climbed the telephone pole and fell in front of a car
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
And to celebrate the raising of our lord I just purchased a bunny buttplug. Am I doing this Easter thing right?
He put his SoundCloud on his Tinder bio. I felt personally attacked.
You know you're out of shape when you're sore after masturbating.
Randomize
