I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
apparently i'm not the first person wake up and realize she's ugly cuz i tore this house apart and there is no sign of my clothes
Too bad it's not "confirm, ignore or not unless I've had 20+ beers"
i wanna have a kid now so by the time he's 20 ill only be 42 and assuming im already divorced we can pick up girls together
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
this is why ugly people need low self esteem. it stops them from doing shit like this.
sleeping in bed with your booty calls married sister...you're the stuff heroes are made of.
Is it inappropriate to be Drs. Willy Fister and Jess Hewill as a couples costume for Halloween?
Oh we're gynecologists
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
My tinder date had to be home by 8:30 cause she's on house arrest.
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
Im pretty sure I didnt bang him becasue I woke up at 6am to him jerking off with a fleshlight right next to me in bed ... He made himself cum and was moaning my name ... MOST AKWARD EXPIERENCE OF MY LIFE
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
Randomize
