Im at strip club and am horny
UPDATE: In a passionate fit of self love, I brought myself to orgasm under the moon on my 7th floor balcony, ejaculating between the rungs towards the ground.
Unfortunately, I did not realize that most of it would end up on the balcony below mine.
At least you don't cum in color.
just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
dont ever smoke after you drink again... i dont think ive ever seen...or heard of someone throwing up and farting at the same time. that is, if you were farting.
so I finished the entire bottle...next thing I know, it's 8 am and I wake up on the fucking beach in the low tide with a family standing about 30 feet from me just staring.
It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
I feel like if you stuck me in a room with all my old toys it'd be the best high ever.
Just had a dream about an abnormally large bottle of tequila. No more depressed drinking for me.
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
You can't give me tequila around boys who have girlfriends. That ain't new.
I gargles a mimosa for breakfast. It's gonna be a killer Monday.
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
Partying with my eighth grade history teacher I know you're jealous
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