I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
I wanna introduce you to my balls, Thunder and Lightning.
We had a weird moment. Mid-sex he started talking. It went along the lines of "I. FUCKING. LOVE.....this condom..."
id say I'm a pretty good fuck buddy, i didn't even booty call him on his girlfriends birthday
I'm home alone drinking wine, so high, scrubbing my house down... This is what my thirsty thursday has become
I immediately regret the tequila decision.
I imagine my service panda will provide sufficient protection. At the very least it will be an irresistible cuddly distraction while I make good my escape.
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
Oh dear. Sending much love.
Just send a machete.
I can't wait to see you again. It will be like when we first started dating- but with less clothes.
He stopped me mid-blow job to say that his new year's resolution was to stop hooking up. MID FUCKING BLOW JOB.
i don't know what it is about you being around kids that makes me want to screw your brains out
That is the creepiest and also the sexist thing you've ever said
i think it's like a sexual celebration of not having kids
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
Randomize
